Traveling without Children

By all accounts, I am a pretty decent traveler. I took my first flight when I moved continents as a baby and have taken approximately 2 to 20 long-haul flights annually since then (until the pandemic brought it all to a halt!).

I spent a decade globetrotting for work with small children at home, traveling over 100,000 miles per year (while having three children over 4.5 years). This gave me deep expertise on pumping on planes and long-haul milk storage, hacks for connecting with little ones from afar, spreadsheets with meal plans and activities (and quite a few tear-stained takeoffs).

Traveling without your children can add a level of stress to parents and children alike for even the most experienced traveler, but with some preparation, can go smoothly for all.

Four Tips for Traveling Without Your Children:

1.     Plan for Success

Utilize a shared calendar in a spreadsheet (we use google sheets) that is shared with all adults in the caregiving team.

You can print out a large copy for the kitchen command center (and additional paper copies for anyone who would like).

This calendar included what the children were doing each day and which adult was responsible for what.

We included departure and arrival times, meal planning, flight and hotel information and all emergency numbers on this document.

2.     Timing Matters

Children don’t have a sophisticated understanding of time.

You can help them understand how long you will be gone by making a cross-off calendar with boxes/circles/animals to color in or cross off for the number of days you will be gone.

Alternatively, paper chains work well - your child can cut one paper circle each day until there is only one left for the day of your return.

They will visually be able to understand even if they aren’t yet able to read.

Wait until just before you leave to tell them.

This may seem counterintuitive as you are thinking a lot about the details in advance, but telling them too soon will cause unnecessary worry.

Think about telling them the night before or the morning you leave.

When you tell them, consider giving them the calendar and something that will keep you connected. You can share something like a matching tiny teddy bears or even a drawing that is cut into pieces (you take one and your children each get a piece).

3.     Make it Easy

Pack bags for after school activities and attached information to the bag (which child, what activity and what needed to be added in, if anything).

Meal plan for the time you will be gone, and include on the spreadsheet, and be sure to stock the fridge.

Include easy things like overnight oats or freezer waffles to help the mornings go more smoothly and simple, easy to prepare dinners.

4.     Keep Connected (Or Not!)

You know your child best, and it may be hard for them to grasp seeing you or hearing from you over technology. The younger your child, the harder the concept may be to understand where you are and why you are not with them physically.

• Leave a photograph of your family together, or just yourself so your child can hang it somewhere special to look at when they miss you.

•  It can often be very emotional for your child to see you on video at bedtime, so you may want to consider doing a phone call instead of Facetime.

• Pack lightweight books to read with your child (turn the camera to the book so they can see the pictures while you read) or record a story for them to watch at home in your absence.

• Call on the way to the school (if you child can handle it) as they will be quickly distracted with friends and their day when you hang up the phone.

• Have a special friend that keeps you connected – you and your child (or children) can each have a tiny bear or other momento like a rose quartz heart or matching charm bracelet, etc.

• When your child misses you, they can snuggle or talk to the tiny bear, hold the charm or heart.